mollysalans.com

“To thine ownself be true,and it will followas the night the daythat thou canst be false to any man. Hamlet-            

Meditation is for Every Parent and Non-Parent

What does it mean to be “true to yourself”? In this day and age we are all so busy, torn between helping our children, our family and our friends, that we believe it is “selfish” to pay attention to ourselves.  And even when we have a minute to be “true”to ourselves, we have no idea which “truth” to follow!

Meditation is a wonderful way of quieting all of those “shoulds” and allowing space and quiet to fill our beings. This space and quiet gives us a much larger picture from which to see our struggles. It is also a creative space, so new ideas can emerge that we wouldn’t have otherwise thought about. It also helps us to sit with unclarity, until true clarity comes.

How many times have I had clients tell me, “well I’ve tried to meditate but I can’t. I can’t quiet my mind.”

Everyone who meditates has this experience over and over again.  I’ve been meditating for over 20 years and I still feel, at times,  that I can’t quiet my mind!  The whole point of meditation is to bring awareness to ourselves and to shed light on just how distracted we are. As you begin to see the obstacles in the way of your own truth, then you can define and follow your own truth with more clarity.

I teach both guided and quiet meditations which will help you understand more clearly how to be true to yourself. Once you have this clarity, then you will most likely see, that you really can’t help others unless you are also being true to yourself. It is a paradox. The more you ignore your own calling, the more pulled you’ll be to help others find theirs.  But all you will receive is more neediness from those you are trying to help and in turn you will become more exhausted, which will lead you to help even more but you will continue to feel more and more exhausted.Once you can begin to fullfill your  own calling, then you will find that those you are helping will be able to follow theirs as well. You will feel more energized and less pulled upon. The more energy you have, the more inspired you are to follow your own calling, which in turn inspires those you are trying to help.

See also: Integrated Kabalistic Healings

                  Family Constellation Work 

When I work with children, I play, We play games and/or do simple art work. We color and paint, or  play with the doll house, dolls, non-electronic toys, cards and more. While I am playing in this way, a very relaxed atmosphere comes in, and the children are able to tell me so many things either directly, or non-directly through the play.

 The children love coming because it is 50 minutes of pure play. If they are drawing picures, sometimes I suggest putting words to their pictures, so they can make a picture book.  I can discern a child’s dificulties through the pictures they create, and Ican help them talk about these difficulties by asking questions about their pictures. Many times, simply reamining quiet is also very therapeutic.  I can discuss the meaning of the drawings with the you, the parents, at another time.

I don’t expect anything of the children, they are allowed to be completely who they are. In this way I can assess more clearly where the difficulties and strengths are.  Once I can assess this, I pull on the strengths in order to raise self-esteem and help the child build more self-confidence.  Once the strengths are shining it is easier to place their weaknesses in a place of light and love. 

 The children may not “get it” but that’s not the point. They feel happier from their core, and to children that’s all that matters.  All children want is to be happy, that is what they gravitate toward, and I base my work on that truth.

 I work with children who have anxiety, ADHD, depression, poor grades, learning problems: I work with children going through changes such as divorce, moves, remarriages and stepfamilies. I also work with children who have difficulty getting along with siblings; parents/teachers and/or friends.

I often include the parents in the play/art therapy because you are the two most important people in your child’s life. So sessions can include the parents only, can include the child with the parents, and the child only.  In this way I receive a really good understanding of the family dynamics involved and can help your child even more. 

See also: Story & Poetry Therapy & Storytelling Therapy 

This May I am offering a class throughActonBoxborough Community Education.Please contact Acton Boxbborough Community Ed. to register. Please call 978-266-2525. Tues. Eve May 6, 2008 7-8:30 pm

Empowering Parents, Parenting from the Inside Out

A two-hour conversation with parents of children of all age

Do you need innovative, inspiring parenting ideas? Are you stuck inside a parenting pattern that never ends? Do your children have learning problems, ADHD, Depression/and or Anxiety?

Do you make lists of affirmations, and have your mind set to positive thinking, only to find yourself in the same old arguments with your children again and again?

There is a way to parent with discipline, clarity and love, regardless of or because of the gifts and ailments your children were born with.

Did you know that you can turn your entire outlook around, from the inside out, which will completely change the way you parent?

While this method is not easy, mainly because parenting is NEVER easy, it is a worthwhile method to learn and know about.

Come for this two -hour discussion with Molly Salans, psychotherapist, and author of Storytelling With Children in Crisis. We will explore these ideas of empowerment which will most likely leave you feeling relieved, inspired and not alone!

Molly Salans is a cofounder of Transitions Counseling Center in Littleton Ma. She is a licensed social worker and licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She has provided counseling for adults, couples, families, adolescents and children since 1988.

Molly incorporates the principals of well-being and wholeness in each session. She offers a variety of modalities in her work incorporating, but not limited to, Integrated Kabalistic Healing, Constellation Work, Meditation, Storytelling Therapy, Poetry Therapy and Play/art Therapy.

When you, as a couple,  are having difficulties, it can mean that the communication process between the two of you has broken down.  Perhaps something has happened in which the trust has been compromised. Without trust a relationship is burdened by blame and arguments. It is, indeed, a trying time, and a very difficult process. Therfore I hold the principles of wholenss in mind while I listen carefully to each of you and watch the interactions between you.The principal of wholeness states that there is something in each of us that has never been broken. This place is vibrant and alive within us and looks down on our brokeness as precious or holy. I don’t bring judgement to the situation, rather I listen to each of you, seeing your vibrancy even through the anxiety and blame.  I watch the interactions between you, and work with the present dynamics, keeping in mind that relaionship is always about a willingness to compromise. Through conversation, exploration and questions I try to gently lead each of you to a common ground from which to rebuild trust and love. You will most likely walk away from these sessions with a more realistic perspective and feeling more peaceful and willing to create more harmony within yourself and with your partner.  In couples work I can offer, Family Constellation Work, and guided meditations. See Also: Family Constellation Work   

In individual therapy I will help you create more harmonious and less stressful relationships. I will also help you more peaceful in stressful situations.I always work from the principals of wholeness, so you will most likely feel more relaxed, inspired and motivated to find creative solutions to the issues you present. I try to help you step back gently from your issue so you can see the larger picture which does include your frustrations. During an individual session you can choose to do or have one of the following healing modalities: Family Constellation Work, guided meditation or a Kabalisic healing.  See Also:Integrated Kabalistic  Healing Family Constellation Work